Swingers tips & tricks

Swinging, also known as partner swapping, is a behaviour in which partners in a committed relationship engage in sexual activities with others as a recreational or social activity. In many cases, swinging is not seen as an activity, but as a lifestyle.

People may choose a swinging lifestyle for a variety of reasons. Some people may engage in swinging to add variety into their otherwise conventional sex lives or due to their curiosity. Some couples see swinging as a healthy outlet and means to strengthen their relationship. Others regard such activities as merely a social and recreational interaction with others.

Misconceptions about swinging and swingers

While swinging or swingers is a fairly common term, there are still a lot of people that have absolutely no idea what it actually means or entails. There are many misconceptions around the swinging lifestyle.

One of these misconceptions is that swingers are cheating. However, consent is absolutely necessary for both parties. With honesty and trust being a key part of a swinging relationship, both partners are encouraged to know exactly what is going on in every situation. Another misconception is that people think that swingers are unhappy in their relationship because they want to have sex with other people. In order to swing you have got to be in a trusting and loving relationship that enables you to feel comfortable. Therefore couples who take part in the swinging lifestyle must be in a solid relationship to be able to do so. This also means that swinging is not an answer to save an unhappy relationship. If the relationship is not strong, all swinging will do is increase your lack of trust and intensify any feelings of jealously.

Tips for beginning swingers

Especially for new swingers, it can sometimes be a bit too much at a couples club or at other swingers events and new swingers can get a little overwhelmed. The tips below will hopefully help you to make those first experiences as pleasant as possible.

  • Even though the life of swingers may seem really exciting to you, it might not turn out to be what you expected. Unexpected feelings of jealously could suddenly emerge. It suddenly becomes really real and exciting and it could lead to getting cold feet, meaning that you become too frightened to something you had planned to do, especially something important. Should these feelings occur and get stronger over time, it might be a sign that you are not yet prepared enough or not ready for the swinger lifestyle yet. The best advice here is that you and your partner immediately take a step back.
  • Experienced swingers are usually very good at sending subtle hints on whether or not they are interested. However, for new swingers this is not always that easy. Honesty here is still the best policy. Kindly say that you are not interested.
  • In the early phases of your swinger experience you could get a little overwhelmed by the ambiance and the sexual vibe and atmosphere. If you feel like you are losing control over the situation, you may want to take a step back. Chatting with your regular partner can also help you to keep an eye on your own limits and wishes.
  • Of course it is not your intention to fall in love while swinging. Should you feel this is happening, it is best to avoid all contact with that couple, at least for a while.

Rules for swingers

Although there is no law for swinging, there are some important rules that everyone is supposed to adhere to:

  1. Adhere to the agreements you make and respect them
  2. No means No. If someone is not interested, leave that person alone.
  3. When you recognize other swingers in everyday life it is best not to confront them with it. Many swingers do not want to get confronted with their lifestyle at birthdays, in the supermarket or at work.
  4. Look after your partner first. Only when you are certain that he or she is fine, you can think of your own pleasure again.
  5. Also pay attention to other swingers wellbeing. If you notice someone is being harassed, it is your duty to do something about that and to help that person.
  6. Safe sex is the starting point. This means that a condom is always used unless both people have agreed that this is not necessary.
  7. Always follow the rules that apply to your current location.

20 fun sex facts

  1. You burn up to 200 calories during half an hour of active sex.
  2. People who make love three times a week look five to seven years younger.
  3. Only bonobos, dolphins and people have sex for fun.
  4. The Greeks have more sex than any other nationality. Is there anything special in that feta cheese?
  5. Men have, on average, eleven erections per day. ELEVEN?!!!
  6. When a woman has an orgasm, the brain section associated with fear is disabled.
  7. People who often French-kiss stay slimmer. A one-minute passionate French-kiss burns about 26 calories.
  8. Women who wear high heels have more intense orgasms.
  9. Sex is the best sleeping drug for men.
  10. People have the most sexual fantasies at work.
  11. Sex makes your hair shine and ensures a healthy blush because your body produces extra oestrogen.
  12. Your immune system gets a boost if you have sex at least once a week.
  13. Couples without a tv in the bedroom have 50% more sex.
  14. The more domestic tasks men do, the less they are in the mood for lovemaking.
  15. 56% of men wanted their penis to be bigger.
  16. Men feel more attracted to women with long hair.
  17. The first year that a couple is together, it has as just as much sex as in the whole course of their further relationship. And that’s a little sad…
  18. The clitoris is the only human organ with only one purpose: pleasure.
  19. 1% of women are able to get an orgasm by just stimulating the breast.

The most popular sexual fantasy? A threesome